Ian Chillag

Ian Chillag created Everything is Alive, an interview show in which all the guests are inanimate objects. Follow him on Twitter here.

How did you get introduced to the audio space? Have you always loved it, before podcasting?
I remember being a kid and my dad picking me up from school and then when we got home, he made us sit in the car in the garage and listen to the end of whatever was on NPR, and I think I had just learned about carbon monoxide poisoning, so I was afraid public radio was going to kill us. So that’s how I got introduced to the audio space. 

I’ve had a bunch of jobs in public radio. I worked on Fresh Air, and Wait Wait, and with Mike Danforth, I co-created a show for NPR called How To Do Everything. We stopped doing it when I left NPR and I really miss making it. I think my favorite thing I’ve ever worked on is a mattress ad Mike and I did. 

Was The Colonoscopy Special real, was it supposed to be funny? Could it ever come back?
It was real! If I remember correctly, it was not meant to be funny, it was meant to be informative. And I would say it was too informative.

How do you prepare people to be on the show? Any tips?
We tell people: no funny voices. The more our objects sound like humans, the better.

And we tell them: make sure you're thinking about a specific object. Meaning, if you're a pencil, don't think of it as representing every pencil in the world. Think of it as a single pencil, with unique experiences and relationships. That makes it easier to create characters that feel real.

And we tell them that the only thing different about the world of Everything is Alive is that things can talk and think. So, like, an ashtray can complain about getting ashed into, but it can't choose to move out of the way. Generally, I think you only get one leap from reality--if you do more than that, everything falls apart. It’s a little like when you’re watching something and somebody comes back from the dead. Then you’re like, well if people can come back from the dead, why should I worry about anybody? 

Also we tell our guests to wear light clothing because our studio gets really hot. Or we did, before covid. I really miss being gross and uncomfortable in a studio with someone! 

Any interesting listener feedback you'd like to share with us?
Lately I’ve heard from a lot of teachers who have been using the show during remote learning. They’re assigning episodes and then asking students to make their own--either writing them up or actually making the audio. And a couple people wrote in and told me they did Zoom birthday parties with an Everything is Alive theme where everybody had to come as an inanimate object. That stuff has been really nice to hear. 

I do think about the people who got invited to those birthday parties and had no idea what the show was but just went with it, and those are some very good friends.

Were there any episodes that you didn't think would work out but they did?
Not really, but there are a lot of things I thought would work out that didn’t. We kill a lot of episodes. I was just saying to someone that I used to have this idea that I wanted to work with all my friends, but now I try not to work with friends because I feel so terrible cutting things that don’t work. It’s already so hard to make the right decision with editing, and you want to know for sure that the reason you’re keeping something is because it’s good, and not because you’re thinking about someone’s feelings. 

(There are exceptions! If you’re reading this, and you’ve been on the show, and we’re friends, I’m not saying we’re not friends!).

Do you think there are any rules all podcasters should adhere to?
Generally no, and I get so excited when I hear something that sounds different. Even if I don’t like it, I’m always thrilled by hearing a thing that just sounds new. I love it when a podcast sounds like it’s made by someone who has never heard a podcast. 

But yes, there is one rule everyone should follow: don’t eat on mic. If you’re doing a food segment, that doesn’t mean anyone wants to hear you chew. Don’t say “mmmmm.” Everyone already knows what eating sounds like and no one needs to hear it. I feel… strongly about this. 

Thanks, Ian!